a thousand words

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

BREAKING NEWS! SCHWARZENEGGER'S LOVE CHILD'S FIRST INTERVIEW!

The Child Of The Governator Defends Father And Sets Critics Down.

Q: First, what's your name and are you a boy or a girl?
A: My name is Dale and I'm not into labels.

Q: Okay. Are you embarrassed by your father?
A: Of course not. He did what he had to do. Have you seen my mom? She's totally hot.

Q: What about Maria?
A: What about her? She's all rich and snooty and what not. She obviously didn't have the man's attention. My moms got it done, you know what I mean?

Q: When did you find out you were Arnold's child?
A: I always knew. I was born with a six-pack. The doctors thought I was choking when I was born. I was just crying with an Austrian accent.

Q: What's your earliest memory?
A: When I was a sperm, we were all racing to that egg. It was tough but I was determined to be born, even though I didn't get there first.

Q: Wait. Once the egg is fertilized, that's it. How did you manage to get in?
A: I told the sperm inside that "I'd be back" and I paid a little visit to the spleen and returned with some toys that got his ass out of there. (Laughs)

Q: Wow. So what's in the future for you?
A: I'm gonna hang with my Dad. Do the talkshow circuit, pump some iron and remind people why he's the man.

Q: So you want to follow in Arnold's footsteps?
A: Absolutely. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. And in this case, the baby didn't fall far from the governor.

Copyright 2011