a thousand words

Wednesday, January 23, 2013


After Millions Of Complaints, Facebook Tries To Eliminate Stupidity With Technology.

How many times has this happened to you?

You make a post, tweet or blog something and someone comes out of left field with logic they pulled out of a crazy man's ass?

Well, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg wants to help you.  Facebook is beta testing a sophisticated algorhythm that will filter out stupid, asinine and annoying comments.  The Digital Analytical Correlation Factor or DACF is being tested as we speak.

Internally, they are calling it the Dumb Ass Comment Filter.

Zuckerberg said: "The digital age has one big drawback. Everyone thinks because they have the technology to post comments, that those comments are intelligent.  It's a false equivalency.  A lot of really stupid people have iphones."

DAFC will block your comment by analyzing the words and making a mathematical calculation of how likely it is to be dumb.  Some examples of words to avoid are: "Conversate," "Hateration," "Real" and "Housewife" and the phrase "What had happened was."

The beta mode will also raise your "block factor" if you put an adjetive, slang or a real or imagined profession in your Facebook name. So if your name is TonyfilmmakerWilson or ShaundadaBrickHouseGreen you might have trouble.  (*Cedric The Entertainer has been given a special waiver by Facebook International)

So watch out people who don't get sarcasm or satire or attention whores posting booty pictures to get  men to compliment you. There's a new Sheriff in town and his badge says DACF.