a thousand words

Sunday, February 23, 2014

10 RULES OF PUSSY MANAGEMENT By Guest Blogger Kizzy Toussaint


by Kizzy Toussaint

I have finally codified my thoughts on Pussy Management. If you hate that word, get over it, because I will be using it a lot. 

First thing you have to do, is learn not to be offended by all the terminology for it. And we should not be offended, because it’s the most valuable commodity in the world.

Did you hear me?

You are sitting on the most valuable commodity in the history of woman and mankind. And just like money, stock or real estate, you need to know how to manage this asset. Most women think they know this by birth but that’s not so. You have to learn how to manage the pussy or you will waste its value on bad deals from the never-ending machinations of men.

So, let me go over the 10 Rules Of Pussy Management:

Rule 1: Pussy is the most valuable commodity in the world.
Rule 2: Pussy is more valuable than Dick.
Rule 3: Pussy is a depreciating asset.
Rule 4: ABF: Always Be Fucking.
Rule 5: NBF: Never Be Fucking.
Rule 6: Pussy Management Necessitates Pussy Maintenance.
Rule 7: Pussy ain’t free (a/k/a Dick is Not Earned.)
Rule 8: Pussy + Freaky = Death Star.
Rule 9: There is no such thing as a Ho.
Rule 10:  Pussy is Power and with Power comes Responsibility.

Rule 1: Pussy is the most valuable commodity in the world.  

Men spend 80% of the day thinking about ass, so a properly managed pussy is a pre-sold asset. Also, woman can have babies, men can’t. Without us, the species dies end of story.[1]

Men know this, so they have for centuries carefully crafted a plan to deprive you of your God-given right to control your pussy. They seek to fool you and depreciate your asset with a societal mind-fuck. 

But how Kizzy? How are the men mind-fucking me? 

Glad you asked. Here's a simple one. Women were told that they should approach sex and relationships like men, give up centuries of female strategy that protected the species and the family and focused men's aforementioned sexual obsession to a greater good. And the result? Women giving away pussy. 


Rule 2: Pussy is more valuable than Dick.

I don’t care if the woman is blind, cripple, half dead or on a reality show. Her vagina is worth more than a thousand dicks. Don't believe me? Consider this: Pussy is so good, some men fuck women after they are dead. Let's move on.

You ever see those big women with kids in the trailer park or the housing project? Most of you probably shake your heads and say, “Damn, look at that fat bitch.” But do you know what I see? I see a woman who despite not being attractive, got a man to screw her and create a life and life opens the door to a world of possibilities. So, you think, “Well, a man will fuck anything.” I say see Rule #1.

Rule 3: Pussy is a depreciating asset.

The value of pussy declines. Once you are, let's say, 18 or so, your pussy's value in society slowly goes down. You don't even notice this for the first 10 years or so, too busy screwing like a man, most of you. So the asset has to be sold for whatever it is you want while the price is right. You want a husband, kids and a picket fence? Get married early; trade while the value is high.

The best trick men have pulled is the Myth Of Equality.[2] They have served up this fallacy that men and women are equal. We are not.  From this trick, comes the Myth Of The Appreciating Pussy. This lie tells women that their pussy appreciates with time based upon the notion that money, education and wisdom make people think more of them sexually. It’s a lie and a bad one. The asset declines with beauty and that declines with time.[3]

Acceptance of Rule #3 is essential to Pussy Management. It is not a trick, a perception or some kind if cruelty. It’s the truth. Now for certain, a woman herself is more valuable over time but a woman is not her pussy and pussy is not a woman. Shake your fist at the sky but accept it, you must.

Rule 4: ABF: Always Be Fucking.

Not literally, of course. But sexiness is the idea that you could be doing it, that is, letting some man have some. I’m not talking about flirting, teasing or hanging out of your clothes like some thirsty, cock-chasing groupie. Good Pussy Management means initially, the perception of pussy is better than the reality of it. A smart vagina owner controls this perception and places her asset under layers of intelligence, class, grace, humility and above all, modesty.

Rule 5: NBF: Never Be Fucking.

No, I’m not talking about celibacy.  I’m talking about moderation and discretion. You know how many guys you’re fucking? As many as people know about. This means don’t give it to loudmouths, pretty boys and idiots. If you do, then you have mismanaged your asset. Sometimes, you just have to say no. And I know it’s hard but see Rules 1 and 2 and Rule 7 below. Just because you can fuck, doesn’t mean you should.

Rules 4 and 5 are tricky because at first blush, they seem to oppose each other but if you are smart they are not. To ABF is to create a perception that your pussy is worth any effort because you dole it out with great discretion because you NBF.

Get it? Good.

Rule 6: Pussy Management necessitates Pussy Maintenance.

A woman must use all of her assets to full effect. What’s the point of having a pussy, if you keep it in a paper sack? Keep the body tight and right. Don’t starve yourself to death, just be healthy. Even though men will fuck anything, it is the quality of men that increases when your asset is managed and maintained.

Rule 7: Pussy ain’t free (a/k/a Dick is Not Earned.)

As with any valuable commodity, pussy must always come at a price to the receiver. Now men don’t want you to think this because well, the only thing better than pussy, is free pussy.

The corollary of this rule is dick is not earned. As we know by now it’s not an accomplishment to get some man to screw you. I see women all the time bragging about the man they laid with. Really? That’s like expecting a high five for breathing.

Rule 8: Pussy + Freaky = Death Star.

In Star Wars, the Empire had the ultimate weapon, that could blow up your entire planet. A properly managed pussy along with knowing how to satisfy in the bedroom is like the Death Star. Any planet of noncooperation a man brings can be blown the fuck up.[4]

Rule 9: There is no such thing as a Ho.

Hate to ruin it for so many people, but the idea that accepting value for your pussy is wrong, is yet another, you guessed it, Mind Fuck. Men went so far as to outlaw it. Why? Because it deprives women of power. Pussy Management teaches us that demanding value for the pussy whether it be love, respect or cold, hard cash is not evil, sinful or debasing. It is the natural order of things.

Rule 10:  Pussy is Power and Power comes with Responsibility.

Most women know that their asset has value, how much is the question. But most never think about the responsibility that comes with it. We all know that you could get pregnant or get a disease but that responsibility applies to you. I’m talking about the Pussy Manager’s responsibility to the world.

Men have strong urges and so do not think as well as they see and feel. If you are mismanaging your pussy, it will always tend to lead them to give in to their lack of control and that ain’t good for nobody.

“But Kizzy, why is the burden always on women? Shouldn’t men learn to control their shit?”

It is the job of the Pussy Managers to keep everything in control. If men could control their urges, it would shift power back to them. They would withhold sex, charge women for children and basically control us with their asset. This is antithetical to nature. That’s why it’s called pussywhipped and not dickwhipped.

Women who believe that every female burden must be borne by men in equal measure have fallen prey to the false equivalency mind fuck. They are argumentative and pissed that their asset comes with such an awesome responsibility. All I can say is, you can’t give it back, bitch. Also accepting value for Pussy Management lessens the burden of responsibility.

So that’s it. Follow these rules and you will be the proud owner of a properly managed pussy. Also, we must teach Pussy Management to our daughters, nieces, cousins and friends. I know it’s gonna be hard. We’ve already lost a generation, so we have to grab the youth and turn their heads toward the light.

Now, get to managing. [5]


[2] Also known as The Myth Of False Equivalency.
[3] If you’re a woman and you’re thinking “What about men? Does their shit decline, too?” Go back and read rules 1 and 2. And if that doesn’t do it then stop reading this, you’re too dumb to understand it.
[4] And you know how the Death Star had that one weakness that the rebels exploited? That would be your pride.
[5] Kizzy Toussaint is an author and blogger. You can find her novel, Slam The Trick on Amazon.

Copyright 2014